Teacher - Kabir ka koi doha sunao.

Little Marwari Child - "Kabiro salo bawro,

Doha diyo banaye,

Khud to salo Khisak gayo,

Manne diyo Fassaye."

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Duniya me kabhi kisi achche insaan ki talaash mat karo,

wo tumhe dunia ki bheed me kahin nahi milega.....

kyonki....
kyonki....
kyonki....
kyonki....

kyonki “HUM” mostly ghar par hi rehte hain.

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Mountain Dew’s Advertisement : -Come lets do something Dangerous.
Lets KISS girlfriend in front of wife. Darr sabko lagta hai par darr ke aage jeet hai

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Arz kiya hai – baith kar mehbooba ki zulfon ke saaye me aisa josh aaya,

Wah

Wah

Wah

Wah

Wah

Wah

Fir kya?

Papa ne dekh liya aur I.C.U me hosh aaya.

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Girlfriend - Chand kahan hai?

Boyfriend - Chand to hai, EK tum aur Ek upar.


After marriage

Wife - Chand kahan hai?

Pati – Andhi hai? Wo upar kya tera baap bulb jala ke baitha hai.

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Doctor : Santaji aapki kidneys fail ho gayee hain.

Santa: Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

What a joke?

Meri kidneys ne to kabhi paper diya hi nahi to fail kaise ho gayee..?


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Mr Bean puts his pencil into a horlicks bottle


Y?

Y?

Y?

To make the pencil taller, stronger & sharper.

He is sooo intelligent, just like you.

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Wife – Jab main gaana gati hun to aap balcony me kyon chale jaate ho?

Husband – Taaki muhalle wale ye na samjhein ki mai tumhara gala daba raha hun.

Santa Banta - Part 1

Laughter is the best tonic....
Enjoy All Time Greatest Santa-Banta Jokes......

Santa: I have swallowed a Key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****. Santa: U r wrong. It's 1394.
(Bolo Tara rara….)




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Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn't came back yet!
Santa(after thinking a while): Why don't u cook something else?

Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home . The steering, dash board, gears of car have been stolen.
After sometime he calls again: I am coming , earlier I sat on the back seat.

Arz Kiya Hai - Part 2

Laughter is the best tonic....
Enjoy These Funny Shayaries in Hindi/Urdu......

Ek Ladki Ko Dekha To Aisa Laga…
Doosri Ladki Ko Dekha To Vaisa Laga….
Jab Dono Ke Joote Padhe Mujhe...
To Ek Jaisa Laga!!!
(Wah Wah Wah Wah….. bhai sahab, joota kaun se brand ka tha?)

Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Ye line samajh me aaye to mujhe zaroor batana . . . .
(Maa Kasam bheja ghum gaya….)




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Woh jab chalti hai to raahon main 100-100 ke note bichaa deta hoonWoh jab chalti hai to raahon main 100-100 ke note bichaa deta hoon.Uske jaane ke baad wo sab note utha leta hoon.
(Udhaari ke paise hai baba… wapas karna padhata hai…)

Door se dekha to koi dikha hi nahi….
Door se dekha to koi dikha hi nahi….
Pass se dekha to waha koi tha hi nahi…..
(Wah Wah…. Bhai jaan aapne aanko ka ilaaz karwa hi lo aap).

Hai tu agar mera dilbar,Hai tu agar mera dilbar,To aaj ke lunch ka bill tu bhar.

Jab jab ghira baadal, teri yaad aayi,Jhoom ke barsa saawan, teri yaad aayi,Bheega main, lekin phir bhi teri yaad aayi,Kyu naa aaye teri yaad?Tune meri chhatri jo abtak nahi lautai…

Nurse: Santa ji Mubarak Ho Aap Papa Ban Gaye!!
Santa Singh: Meri Wife Ko Mat Bolna Main Usse Surprise Dunga!!

Arz Kiya Hai.....

Laughter is the best tonic.....
Enjoy These Funny Shayaries in Hindi/Urdu......

Maathe Pe Lahu, Sir Pe Ret....
(Gaur Pharmaaiye...)
Maathe Pe Lahu, Sire Pe Ret...
Kyuki Sajini Ne Phool Mara Hai, GAMALA SAMET!!!
(Can you please call the ambulance???)

Patient: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye?
Doctor: ye mera pehla operation hai… Success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye.

Thought of the day: “agar aap bus pe chadein…yaa phir bus aap pe chadein….dono case mai ticket aapka hi kat tha hai….

Santa: I kiss my wife everyday before leaving for office, what about you?
Banta: Me too, after you leave.

Veeru:basanti in kutto ke aage mat naachna.
Sardarji sitting with his dog in d theater.
Saali naachegi kaise nahi, kutte ka bhi ticket liya hai.

GHUNGHAT MEIN TUJHE DEKHA TO....
GHUNGHAT MEIN TUJHE DEKHA TO....
TUMHARA DEEWANA HUA,
SANGEET KA TARANA HUA,
SHAMA KA PARWANA HUA,
PAR JAISE HI GHUNGHAT UTHAYA,
IS DOONIYA SE RAVANA HUA
(Ram Naam Satya Hai....)

Kaun Kahata hai ki Kayamat Aayegi Aur Sab Mar Jayenge.....
(Gaur Pharmaaiye...)
Kaun Kahata hai ki Kayamat Aayegi Aur Sab Mar Jayenge.....
Hum To Raipur Wale Hai, Pedh (Tree) Par Chad Jayenge.....
(Laa Re Seedhhi laa.....)



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